The Jessica Journals:

June 20, 2006: The Wages Of Sin

Sweet fulfillment is finally mine!

Having dropped out of high school at the end of my ninth grade year in order to pursue a course of autodidactism, I, understandably, never had a yearbook of my own. Yes, I have appeared in yearbooks, both in my sister Julia's 8th grade one, the committee of which I helped head up, and, somewhat more inexplicably, in some of the candid photos that appeared in one of my brother John's yearbooks.

I have not, however, up until this point, ever had my actual portrait appear in a yearbook, but now in the Year of Our Lord 2006 at the ripe olde age of twenty-four, that deficit has been fully balanced.

As you, my Blessed Reader, may or may not remember, in September last, out of the kindness of my heart, I engaged in a bit of harmless legerdemain on behalf of my sister Julia. Namely, when she was tired, cranky, exhausted, and still not registered at her school, I stood in for her, signed all her papers, and had my photo taken for her student ID. Good fun was had by all, and when I say "all" I mean "myself"--my sister being asleep at the time in question and my mother being brought to the verge of a mental breakdown by this bit of illegal play-acting.

Now I have discovered, lo these many months later, that the picture of myself, which I so kindly lent to Julia's student ID, is also the picture that appears in her freshman yearbook.

Somewhat appropriately, I appear on page 66 where I have a class clown above me and to my right, a third-rate jock to my left, and the future Kirk Cameron directly beneath me, all of which apparently makes me nervous because I am flashing a forced I'm-10-Years-Older-Than-All-Of-You-And-You're-All-Idiots smile.

My sister Julia has, very kindly, given me her yearbook as a keepsake, which I will now treasure for the rest of my life--particularly the inscriptions scrawled on the last page which include the following declarations: "AMAZING SUGUOI (whoops) SUGOI SUGUI...SUPERBE!!" "Bethany thinks that your [sic] amazing!!" and "Pankakeboy".

Thank God none of those phrases have any particular meaning to me because, although my portrait appears in the yearbook, I did not spend a single day attending class...which is really the best way to face education.


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Copyright 2006 Julia Menn